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Helen Clay (Class of 2010)
Helen Clay tackles the challenges of freelancing
Freelancing seems like the ideal career to me. No commute to an office, the freedom to set my working hours and days, and a quiet environment. So when it came to choosing an internship in the summer of 2009, I figured I'd go with a freelance position. I secured a neat project, interesting and with a mix of skill challenges, and best of all completely freelance. I committed to 180 hours of work over three months, which would give me plenty of flexibility for the good things in life like kayaking and thinking.
And then I hit the wall. Freelancing, I naively thought, is simply working at home instead of in an office. It'll be easy and fun. But it wasn't. Now, you may be the kind of person who is rigidly self-disciplined. Perhaps your pile of dirty dishes is never taller than you are. If so, I recommend you stop reading right about now and continue with your shining and successful life. If, however, you occasionally find yourself on the sofa when there's an article you should be writing, or eating dry Cheerios because you haven't quite made it to the store this week, then read on.
The wall I encountered is called procrastination, and for me it's high, solid, and formidable. Sure, I knew it was there already; I've pulled a few all-nighters with the best of 'em, but I figured I was all grown up now and this time it would all be different. Sadly, I was wrong. Although my project was a good one, I found it difficult to get started. Even when I'd successfully interviewed one subject, I would get the same set of nerves and anxiety before speaking to the next one. And so it went on. I was falling farther and farther behind. I hadn't sent my supervisor any draft material because I was so worried he'd dismiss it as rubbish. I wasn't spending any fun time kayaking instead -- I'm not that kind of procrastinator -- I was simply frozen to the spot, eating myself up from the inside out with worry and guilt: not working, not thinking, and certainly not happy.
About six weeks in, I realized I was in serious danger, and went to seek help at the Douglas College Learning Centre. I found it deeply humiliating to say out loud, "I am a procrastinator." However, the folks in the Learning Centre were nothing but kind and understanding. Through one-on-one work with a tutor, I've learned several successful work strategies. For example, finding a productive work environment is important (I use libraries, cafés, even the mall sometimes), and developing sound time management skills helps me schedule work and complete it ahead of deadline.
I've come to realize that procrastination has held me back, not from being an amazing superwoman who can take on even more work, but from simply enjoying the work I currently do. With practice, maybe I'll have that successful freelance career after all. Sound desirable? I think so.
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Posted April 2010
